God helped me realize that I am not in control of my husband’s recovery. It’s out of my hands. I have to surrender to Him and learn how to let go of control in a relationship and instead surrender that relationship to God.
After facing an intimate betrayal, or any other trial for that matter, we all have to figure out how to trust God in difficult times. We’re tempted to believe that when life is hard it’s somehow an indication that God has abandoned us, or that He is untrustworthy. But it is a lie. In times like these, passages like Psalm 37 offer encouragement, hope, and a wonderful model around which we can build prayers to calm our anxious hearts. The Psalm 37 message teaches us to delight in the Lord, it reminds us of the ultimate fate of both the wicked and those who choose to follow God, it reassures us that the Lord is fighting for us, but most important, it shows us exactly how to trust God in difficult times.
Here you are, you’ve found yourself in that terrible place which has become a reality for countless wives across the world. You’ve discovered your husband has a pornography problem. Maybe you’ve known for a while that he looked here and there, or that he “struggled,” but you’ve finally come to recognize that this is no small issue. You’re hurt and confused, and not sure what in the world you should do next. You need answers, but where do you look? Who can you trust?
The Bible tells a story of a woman – a widow who persistently sought justice from an evil judge. Jesus encouraged us to approach our Heavenly Father with that same kind of persistence in prayer, knowing He will surely grant us justice – and quickly! This is the story of my own persistent prayer.
Let’s be honest, we don’t often find ourselves on the mountain tops of life questioning God’s goodness, or His plan for us. It is in the depths that these questions surface. It is beneath the crushing weight of life’s sorrows that God’s good plan begins to feel like a far off fairy-tale written for someone else. This is when we must force ourselves to answer the question: Do I TRUST God’s GOOD plan for me?
For the past four weeks we’ve been studying the Bible to learn some of what the Infinite God has revealed to us about Himself. We discussed His identity as the Triune God, and unpacked the unique characteristics of Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Today, we’ll wrap up this series with a look at His infinite qualities, and how we should respond.
It is imperative to a life of victory that we learn how to properly understand and then trust the promises of God. I’ve told you before about the time I found myself so buried in despair it felt like God was a liar. My circumstances seemed to contradict passages like Psalms 91. I didn’t feel like God was protecting me. It felt like the evils He promised wouldn’t touch me were actually consuming me!
What I’ve learned in the years since that time is this: I have to allow God to give me a proper understanding of His promises. I need eyes to see and ears to hear what He’s teaching me. When Scripture seems to contradict reality, I have to first allow the Word of God to interpret the Word of God. Then, I have to choose to believe it. Whether it seems true or not.
If you’ve been with us for the past 5 weeks, we’ve been working our way through a series on Biblical boundaries. We’ve learned a lot! Today, we’re finally going to wrap this series up with a quick reminder of who’s in control. What it’s so easy to forget in the midst of all the chaos of life is that being obedient to God in this area (really in any area) allows us to step out of the way and Him to do His work. It puts God in control!
Are you a betrayed wife who is fiercely committed to seeking and following God as you heal? Are you looking for a community of like-minded women also recovering from betrayal trauma? Would you like to join our secret Facebook support group? Connect with Cherith on Facebook, and send me a private message to request to be added.
Or, contact me via email if you just need someone to talk to who understands and is committed to gently pointing you toward Jesus.
